tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6950881456564209494.post689701184516736412..comments2011-03-13T09:25:28.869-07:00Comments on Using Our Words: Survival instinctBarbara Lorrainehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18327003775573299650noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6950881456564209494.post-81001321722970592022009-09-21T21:24:22.001-07:002009-09-21T21:24:22.001-07:00To respond very late:
Nina, you're totally ri...To respond very late:<br /><br />Nina, you're totally right about the ending line. I'm not so hot at those, but I hereby swear I will come up with a better ending soon and edit the post to reflect my progress!<br /><br />Also, glad you two liked it ;)Geoffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04816489400959448675noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6950881456564209494.post-58418275266498456992008-12-12T17:40:00.000-08:002008-12-12T17:40:00.000-08:00Tightly written- reminds me also of Vonnegut- with...Tightly written- reminds me also of Vonnegut- without ripping anything off. I really enjoyed reading this story. I'm glad you didn't overexplain. You trust the reader to both imagine, make logical connections, and be the judge of the conclusion. I found this to be a very intelligent piece. I admit, however, I did not like the final line. Too trite of a endnote: 'lonely nightmare' - especially when already emphasized by the title 'survival instinct'- I think if you tinker with the phrasing it can work much better. Thanks for the writing!Partially Yours, Ninahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16448931780429035207noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6950881456564209494.post-27770309447173528572008-12-08T00:20:00.000-08:002008-12-08T00:20:00.000-08:00Geoff, I already told you what I think, but I'll s...Geoff, I already told you what I think, but I'll say it again: Vonnegut meets Serling. Joy!<BR/><BR/>Maybe take it a step further and have the protagonist drink the Kool-Aid, maybe driven mad by his being the only sane one left. Maybe he sends himself to the cornfield ;-)Barbara Lorrainehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18327003775573299650noreply@blogger.com